Monday, December 30, 2002 :::
 
Ben and me. Two.

-Matt, Christ, Greg, that was a fast reply...

::: posted by Comic Tools at 3:14 PM


 
Oy. Two men on this blog have a "she who shall not be named." If I were one of you men who still have their girlfriends, I'd be afraid, very afraid...the bad girlfriend bug is comin for you next!

And Jason, lemme get this straight. You say something like "the hours grow short", and you're sayin' I spend too much time exposed to Lord of the Rings? In the words of Eric Clapton, "before you accuse me, take a look at yourself."

As for the New Years thing, we'll just have to wait for calls from Christy. I just don't know.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 2:34 PM



Saturday, December 28, 2002 :::
 
Suuuuure you've never said anything so strange. And I've got disoriented hobbits flying out of my ass. :P

::: posted by Comic Tools at 10:12 PM



Wednesday, December 25, 2002 :::
 
HELLO? HELLO? MY HEARING AID IS BROKEN! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! SPEAK UP! HELLO?

"Fool of a Took, one more blunder from you and I'll shove you dick-first so far up my ass it'll look as if I've a second butt coming out of my first!"

Remember the sun, he's the reason for the season!

And now I go.



::: posted by Comic Tools at 7:04 PM



Friday, December 20, 2002 :::
 
I keep writing in here and it never seems to stick. Work. Post. Whatever. And I'm still curious about October and November, as well as the first 12 days of December. Where are they?

I'm going to Maine tomorrow, or maybe the next day. Maybe I will see some of you. I don't really know what my plans are. I am coming back down here sometime too. Actually I'm going to be living in Maine for a couple months, February probably, maybe others too.

I just got back from a week in New York city. I designed a show called Christmas With The Flamingos. Anybody in NYC this weekend should go see it. It runs at 3, 8, and 10pm tomorrow and 3 and 8 Sunday (you missed a bunch of shows that already happened too, you losers). It's at 750 8th Ave between 46th and 47th on the 5th floor and costs a little bit of money ($10 i think) but probably the cheapest show you'll see in New York. Mention my name and you'll have to pay triple. Do not bring your mother or tell her about it. Do not tell anybody I told you to go. Better yet, don't go at all. You all are too young for this.

See you soon.

::: posted by Jeff at 10:49 PM


 
Ahem. A few points, Greg:

1-"Tight Maine people?" You've seen Molly and Christy more times since went to school than I have.
2- "Known each other for years?" You've known Molly longer than I have.
3- "If we'll have you?" Greg, if you weren't welcome as a friend, you wouldn't be on the blog.

OF COURSE WE'LL FRIGGING HAVE YOU! Work it out with Christy, as her house seems to be the locus for the party. Hope to see you there, you cookie-eating maniac, you!

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 2:31 PM



Tuesday, December 17, 2002 :::
 
Sorry, just blowing off a bit of steam...I just think that by now you, your friends, and myself have earned just a bit more trust behavor-wise than we're given. I know DAMN few teenagers as reponsible as our group, let alone as trustworthy, principled, or un-horny.

::: posted by Comic Tools at 5:47 PM


 
Yes, I think your house best be avoided- your mom is so damn paranoid about having us lacivious, raping men around with their horny, irresponsible, loose daughter in the same room WITH NO SUPERVISION that she'd think you were being inconsiderate of her (read: don't care about or love her) if you had it there. Better at someone else's house, with more sensible adults.

Oh god, you know us wild teenagers, you girls will probably all be spewing babies out of your vaginas like tennis ball machines after the party.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 5:44 PM


 
Hmm. The only way I could see Theo is if I slept over and he came before, say, nine at latest, but the thirtieth thing is still good for me.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 1:24 AM



Monday, December 16, 2002 :::
 
Gone the 27th to the 29th? Damn you. Oh well, have a nice time.

I wll be arriving in Maine on the nineteenth, around ten in the morning. I stay till the first, I believe. So the thirtieath is doable.

I also propose that Molly and Christy make themselves available before Christmass, because I have gifts I'd like to give you, and rather than give them to you and have you open them on Christmass, I'd prefer to actually see you open them.

And now to my personal blog...

::: posted by Comic Tools at 6:19 PM



Monday, December 09, 2002 :::
 
Well, it would be a bit more than grounding...there are many families who would permanently disown their child were they to find out a:the child had sex before marriage and b:they wanted an abortion. You might think, quite rightly, that this is a situation where you'd want to be at least a bit compassionate, if not supportive of your child, who's obviously in deep enough shit as is, but there's alot of people who'll throw their kid out on the streets over this sort of thing, throw the college fund into the retirement fund, and forget they had a child.

On a lighter note, as I was walking over to the library this morning, a man looked at me, pressed his fingers to his temples, and said a loud "Hmmm..." as he walked past. Yup, I'm in New York.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 11:24 AM



Saturday, December 07, 2002 :::
 
Speaking of Christy, in answer to her question, a coathanger is a common tool for back alley abortions, which are done in cases where safe abortions either cannaot be found, are illegal, or the kid is to scared get a proper one done because the law in some states forces the doctor to tell the parents. The coathanger procedure, along with the punch in the stomach and drinking poision procedures, typically either severely injure or kill the woman as well as the child. This is why laws saying that the hospital has to tell the parents when an abortion is performed are stupid. I understand that perents want to know what their child is up to, but is it worth the life of their child?

Anyway, the joke is that it's more humane to kill a fetus with a coathanger than to make it grow up and have to sit on Santa's lap. That's why Ben said it was sick.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 3:26 PM



Friday, December 06, 2002 :::
 
Please- don't even mention Octob-*shudder, sobs*, um, the "O" word or the "N" word. The memories are just to painful for all of us. I just thank God we were never caught, and that the evidence is safely hidden in the anus of a mexican man who can't remember his name or his past.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 6:52 PM


 
On the 'archives'... What happened to October and November? Why is that portion of memory lane closed off? And what is 'error 503'? Also, what were the first 502 errors? Whose fault were they? Who is responsible? Will this be passed on to the taxpayers?

::: posted by Jeff at 10:31 AM



Thursday, December 05, 2002 :::
 
Um...no one's said- what do you think of my cannibalism/charity site?

Oh, and Ben, that coat hanger thing was just wrong wrong wrong wrong hilarious wrong wrong.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 6:37 PM



Wednesday, December 04, 2002 :::
 
Carter, that was precious. Of course you are not surprised that I enjoyed such smut. Anyone who has read Molly's blog knows that I am a dirty old man who enjoys strippers and should be kept away from children. Which reminds me, I just signed my contract to work a 4th year at Friends Camp. Will I be seeing any of you there? I hope so.

Today is Amanda Martin's birthday. Any of you who know Amanda, make her happy and send her your wishes. You can just scream it out the window. She lives in Cambridge MA. Maybe she will hear you.

Speaking of strippers, Molly.

(OK-- rationale behind that last bit:
first I was going to actually say something to Molly after that. By the time I got to the comma, I forgot what it was. Then I realized it was pretty good that way, especially since Molly made me sound like a dirty old man in her BLOG. It's OK, she has already apologized, to me at least, but still... In fact, as far as I know, Molly is not a stripper, at least not publicly, although she is very clean, like Paul's grandad, and so surely she showers in the buff. But don't we all. Except in the summer. Perhaps it's time for a new topic before I manage to alienate myself completely.)

I went to Amherst last night to see Mitch Hedberg with Allegra. (If you don't know Mitch, you are really missing something amazing. www.mitchhedberg.net is his site, i think.)

Do you all do that AIM thing? If you do, my thingy is apteryx537, and you should make noise in this direction, cause i get sick of the same old people all the time. And Molly's never around. And Carter doesn't say much. Which is really too bad, because he is a delightful person when he does. Also, reluctantly, I just made a poorly-thought-out "quiz" thing that you should all fail, just to make me look popular. Thanks.

::: posted by Jeff at 8:09 PM



Tuesday, December 03, 2002 :::
 
Oh, this is good. A famous German...umm...guy named Rolf Eden, who evidently is something like Hugh Hefner without the dignity, has come up with an interesting challenge.
He just offered $125,000 to any woman who can kill him with sex.

...

Right...so...yeah...

-Carter, I smell a reality show in this somewhere...

::: posted by Carter at 12:48 AM



Monday, December 02, 2002 :::
 
My web project for visual computing is now online. See it at http://dronf0.tripod.com. And don't give me shit about the ads, I hate them too.

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 6:06 PM


 
So he's slightly shorter than Al and a blackbelt...I'd like to see that. How does he dress? And do you mean old Al or current Al?

-Matt

::: posted by Comic Tools at 11:27 AM

ARCHIVES :::

Ben, Nick, Molly, Matt, Carter, Maria, Christy, Jason, Greg, Eric, and UNCLE JEFF!! We are truly honored to have someone among us who is over 20 and claims to have some sort of responsibility. It won't last long.