Tuesday, July 29, 2003 :::
 
I responded to it in your comments, along with three other people so far. Remember, you just installed comments, so people could comment on your entries? *Knocks on Ben's head, which replies with an empty-coconut shell sort of sound*

::: posted by Comic Tools at 7:29 PM



Tuesday, July 22, 2003 :::
 
I'd just like to go on the reccord and say that I fully support Saddam's sons' descision not to surrender to U.S. forces. In gratitude to their descision to forever bleach the stain of their family from the human gene pool, I hereby nominate them both for a Darwin award. My sincerest thanks goes out to the both of them for dying, as well as to the fine men and women of the U.S. military that made their deaths possible.

::: posted by Comic Tools at 10:46 PM



Monday, July 21, 2003 :::
 
I have dicovered something new to aspire to.

-Carter, that was a really long weekend

::: posted by Carter at 5:17 PM



Saturday, July 19, 2003 :::
 
Jesus Jack shit in a juicer!

Altarboys gang-raping the POPE! Do you know what the FB fucking I is doing NOW?! Do you? This man was in a bookstore, and he was carrying a printout of an online article whose title was "weapons of mass stupidity." Someone took offense and called the authorities. A team of FBI agents showed up at the man's door a few days later. He didn't even remember what the article was about when they came by. And while they were questioning the man, they said this:

"Like I said, there's no problem. We'd just like to get to the bottom of this. Now if we can't, then you may have a problem. And you don't want that."

They fucking THREATENED the poor guy! Flying baby shit, man! The full account of the interrogation and a link to the article the guy was reading is at Thismodernworld.com. Incidentlly, the paper the article was from runs This Modern World.

No wonder God is giving us the finger. Well, right back at ya', ya big cloud-sitting fuckwad.

Oh, and on a lighter note, here's this line from an IM conversation I'm having:

FnOrDy ErIsTiAn: Just put my downy balls into the rinse cycle, and your clothes come out soft and relaxed!




::: posted by Comic Tools at 9:52 PM



Thursday, July 17, 2003 :::
 
There's something beautiful happening on the news lately. Journalists that people actually watch are asking hard, critical questions about the president. In just this last week, the questions have risen markedly in intensity, from "might some of the intelligence have been inaccurate?" to "Did Bush lie deliberately in his state of the Union speech?" Cracks have been appearing in Bush's armor of unchallengeability like an ice cube dropped into water. It seemed only awhile ago that the man had the supernatural power to do and say anything, and the media would either say nothing or parrot it. (That is when they could trouble themselves to take their beaks off the president's dick where they'd been perching for five seconds, lest they be labeled liberal tratiors and get personally named in the next printing of Ann Coulter's book. ) The same anchors who only a few months before were jerking off into flags while narrating computer dramatizations of all the millitary's shiny new weapons are now publicly questioning the fuhrer's integrity.

Finally, this is one story I won't have to link you to, because it's not buried and ignored. (just weakly reported.) Even fox news is addressing it, albeit by saying "Hey, at least he lied about rationale to go to war, instead of something of dire importance to the country, like a blowjob! Oh, wait..."

I've been weak in reporting politics lately, and I will continue to be until I'm back in school, or at least out of work. But if you haven't noticed, the popular kids in the middle of the playground have finally caught onto this little "being critical of your leaders" game we've been playing. Grab yourself a hot dog from the concessions man, this could be a fun game to watch.

::: posted by Comic Tools at 9:33 PM


 
So, that's what...like plato's cave, only backwards? Ok, sure, why not.

-Carter. prepping for the big yakuza versus zombies versus Godzilla versus Rodan versus Mario versus Pickachu versus Link party tomorrow

::: posted by Carter at 12:43 AM



Monday, July 07, 2003 :::
 


::: posted by Comic Tools at 10:09 PM


 
I have a job now, and what that means for you people is this:

I am unavailable 9-6:15 most nights, 9-5:15 if you let me know in advance.

I am unavailable saturday, unless you let me know a week in advance. Sunday is my day off. I can, with a week's notice, switch that to any day of the week. But then I'd be working sunday, keep in mind.


I am open in the evenings, and I request that you please include me in any and all plans, as I'll be craving relaxation with friends like a crack fiend on withdrawl.



::: posted by Comic Tools at 9:18 PM



Tuesday, July 01, 2003 :::
 
Wow. I inadvertently summoned Carter by mentioning an anime-related thing. It's like the bat-symbol to that boy. Thanks Carter, by the way.

-Matt, oven chimps.

::: posted by Comic Tools at 9:23 PM


 
In the interests of accuracy, I feel I need to point out that although they are a real product, they are obviously NOT official Gundam condoms. The font is the same, but they've substituted "condom" for "Gundam" and where it ought to say "mobile suit" it instead says...something a bit obscene. And furthermore, since they look slightly dated, I would guess it's actually a parody of original Gundam, as opposed to Gundam Wing.

Carter, thank you, and have a nice day.

::: posted by Carter at 4:35 AM

ARCHIVES :::

Ben, Nick, Molly, Matt, Carter, Maria, Christy, Jason, Greg, Eric, and UNCLE JEFF!! We are truly honored to have someone among us who is over 20 and claims to have some sort of responsibility. It won't last long.